Of course I still think about you. It’s impossible not to, during the time of year when the leaves turn colors, and the air cools down.
I remember the first time I saw you. I was walking past the outdoor hockey courts, and you and your friends were playing. Everything about you screamed at me, beckoning my attention, before you had even noticed me. You were the personification of every fairy-tale prince I had penned in my stories, since I was a little girl, down to the very last physical detail. It was shocking. Startling. And I bashfully looked away, while my accomplice insisted that you looked up and stared after me… with just as much interest as I had in you.
I was just a teenage girl. An ugly duckling who was stuck inside of her shell. I already had it in my head that I was undeserving of any affection, and that had nothing to do with you. But I certainly couldn’t bring myself to talk to you, any of the rest of the times I saw you when I made a point to pass by those hockey courts on a regular basis, on my daily stroll. Even when you whistled. Even when you tried to get my attention. I couldn’t stop. My insecurities wouldn’t allow it.
And then it happened. Due to the strangest of circumstances that to this day I really cannot remember, my best friend at the time drove us to this house that I had never been to. And when we walked inside of a garage turned into a game room, with boys our age shooting pool and hanging out…
There you were.
I was still too shy to say much, even though you put on quite a show in front of your friends to impress me, that night. And you asked me out on a date, which became my very first, ever. My first date led to my first kiss, and turned into my first love. My first everything. And even as everything fell apart, I only wanted to see the good.
I still only see the good.
Oceans of time have passed, and still you and I have a bond that no amount of distance can diminish. That chemistry we shared is something that has inspired many of my characters, and it’s something that still sticks with me today. That spark in our touch. The do-or-die in our kiss. The craving to be even closer, still. Insatiable. Demanding.
It cannot be manufactured.
And yes, I still think of you every year, around this time that our paths first crossed, seventeen years ago. No matter what happens, or where our paths take us, our souls were fused together at that time, never to be pried apart, and you can’t forget or set aside that kind of special.
I could continue on, for hours. I could - and have - spun my most beautiful love stories off of what all that encompassed us, and what we became. You are an inspiration I will never let go of. You are an experience I will never forget.
Forever in my heart, as I know I am also in yours,
In the last week, my characters have screamed at me, and they have rebelled. They resorted to the silent treatment. They have stormed away and slammed the door behind them, threatening never to return. They have frustrated me to no end, but I’m happy to say that we have all come to a truce.
The truce being that THEY are now calling the shots, and not letting me have a say, or get a word in, edgewise. Writer’s block has now been unblocked. And, at their insistence, their entire story is being rewritten. By them.
The second her eyes caught his, she had to look away. An overwhelming blush that flushed downward and over her breasts spoke of nothing but lust and desire that intensified with each second that his gaze lingered over her face. There wasn’t anything she could do to stop it; furthermore, she wasn’t sure she even wanted to. The only reason she turned away was her falling prey to her own vulnerability. Not wanting to reveal too much, when her own body mercilessly betrayed her.
It was too late, now. He already saw. And the lascivious upward curl of his lips that she dreamed about pressing hers against caused a flutter in her heart that wouldn’t be quelled anytime soon. He was toying with her.
But she always returned the favor.
10. I am the very definition of socially awkward.
9. I am always tripping, falling, slipping, knocking into things.
8. I love listening to AND singing along with opera.
7. If there’s an NFL game on, I absolutely can’t concentrate on anything else. To hell with being productive on Sundays, Mondays, Thursdays, and some Saturdays during football season…
6. If I don’t have at least two shots of espresso first thing in the morning, you will NOT want to be around me.
5. I’m impulsive, but all of my best decisions have come of this trait.
4. I will go to the ends of the Earth for Love, and don’t you try to stop me. (see #5)
3. I am brought to tears every time I hear about cruelty to an animal.
2. I am sensitive to the paranormal.
1. I lead a double life. ;-)
to be the
the mind goes
really as good
as they once